Was He Preparing Me?

Today, I watched a video about mental illness and mental wellness. As I watched my mind drifted back to my childhood and I got a powerful jolt. Was God preparing me for this new direction in my life even then? Let me explain.

The last few years I have been involved with the African American Family Wellness Group which is the black cultural competency component for the Department of Mental Health. My interest in joining the group was birthed in my dealing with the young men and women that participated in our after school program. These children had varying mental wellness issues. Some were diagnosed as ADHD; others had image problems that resulted in acting out. Still others were academically deficient but there was no learning disability present. They got behind in their grade level, behaved badly and ended up in special education where they continued to slide down that slope to dropout land. That just exacerbated the problem which were originally unnoticed, unattended, emotional problems stemming from family drama, bullying or some other trauma. I realized that the parents of these kids needed help so they could help their children.

I never had any intent to get involved in mental health. Like most people, when mental illness is mentioned I thought of the clinically insane, mentally challenged people that need medication, continuing therapy and observation and possibly institutionalizing. That was my experience.
When I was a young child, one of our neighbors gathered us neighborhood kids up to take us to entertain people in the minimum security section of the local mental hospital. We called her and the ladies with her, The Gray ladies, because they wore gray uniforms. I knew we made the people happy but I didn't like it when they wanted to hug us and kiss on us. It was creepy. But we had to let them to a point. We were shown how to minimize their contact without hurting their feelings.  Was this the first step in my training?

My next phase of training occurred at age 16. A government employment program designed for underprivileged kids (aka black kids) was the tool used. We were assigned to the Park and Recreation department of Bryce Mental Hospital. Yes, the very same hospital with the Gray Ladies. We assisted the psychologists and therapists with physical activities and games. That was a very educational summer. Our clients included the criminally insane, nymphomaniacs, manic depressives, schizophrenics, and a young lady of society placed there because she embarrassed her parents by getting pregnant.

My last phase at this hospital was while I was in college. I was employed as a file clerk. Phase Three. I worked directly with the Supervising doctor and his nurses. I had access to all their records. That is why I was amazed that I didn't know the gentleman who cleaned my office was a paranoid schizophrenic with homicidal tendencies until my last day there. I knew he was ill but I never had a reason to fear him. That day he asked me if there was anything he could do for me, my office, before Monday. I told him I would not be back. It was my last day because I had to return to college. He lost it. I was trapped in my office. He never threaten me. My fear or panic was short lived. I felt sad that I had triggered him. He was whisked away to be medicated.

Was I being prepared for this next phase in my life? I have a passion for the mental wellness of Black male kids and their families. I want to interrupt the prison pipeline. I want to restore their esteem and understanding that they were created for greatness not prison slavery. I want to wake up my community to the power they possess to change these dynamics. I want to save their lives.

I am more awakened and ready for this journey. Let's do this, God. Thanks for preparing me, even when I could not recognize your hand or your presence.

Comment Mystery Solved

Hey Friends,

Some of you have said you wanted to comment but it was confusing or difficult. I went to the blog as a guest and tried to comment. Here is what I discovered had to be done to be successful.

If there have been no comments click on "No Comments" and a drop box will appear.

In the box that says "Comment As" click on the arrow and your choices will appear.

You may choose:

Google Account - You will have to sign in to your account

                                              This is true for the other accounts listed

                                   Name/URL- Type your name. 

                                        If you have a website, etc type the URL, if not leave it blank.

                                   Anonymous - you don't want to be known

If you chose Name or Anonymous, when you publish it will ask you to prove you are not a robot by typing in the numbers or letters shown.

It will then publish your comments.

I hope this helps. I really would like to read your comments.

My Wagon Ran Off The Road

You know how people say they "fell off the wagon" when they return to an old habit that they had walked away from? Well, I didn't fall off the wagon. My wagon ran off the road, down the hill and flipped over, pinning me down in the ravine. I allowed other people to derail me. Yes, that's right. I allowed. I can't blame anyone else. The funny thing is I continued to study about good health through good nutrition as I rolled down the hill.

So what is your point. My point is that even the knowledgeable, and I have a lot left to learn, can succumb to their weaknesses. I asked myself the question "How can I help anyone else when I can't help myself." The only thing I can see coming from this is an understanding of others' struggles. If this helps me have more compassion for them then it is worth it. It takes a former alcoholic to best help an alcoholic, so I guess I am going to be that foodaholic to help other food drunks.

My victory will come but it won't come without a strong, hard fight.

Once again I am beginning. Detox begins today. Getting the sugar out of my system. I cannot eat from the king's table. I have to remain vigilante minute by minute. I am listening to Fred Hammond's We are More than Able. 

"Remember your every lion's den and your last Red Sea." 

I am more than able.With the Lord on my side I can do it.

 I have to keep repeating that as I Praise Him through the Night. It is so on time.

I allowed former insecurities triggered by other peoples' accusations and the hurt they caused to become boulders on my road. I am getting a brand new wagon and getting back on the road. I have cleared these boulders and I plan to pay attention to avoid future obstacles.

My Victory is Eminent!

Sistah Strength

It was a powerful and beautiful thing to see black woman of different ages and backgrounds working together for a common cause. We dispelled the lie that we are a bunch of angry woman who always want to fight. We dispelled the lie that we are ignorant and hoochie only. We dispelled the lie that no man can work with us and be supported for his strength.
Now this is not news to most of us. We know our strength is not angry. Our assertiveness is not angry. It is knowledge, wisdom and respect. For my sisters out there that have accepted the lie, give it back. You are better than that.

On Saturday, October 11th a group of black women executed the plan that a subset of those women created in order to present to the community a women's symposium on depression. We worked as a team, a well-oiled machine. Additionally, our host an Hispanic Pastor and one of his female (Latina) members worked with us. She became part of the female team. Pastor Ruben was our spiritual leader that day but he rolled up his sleeves and served us. There was mutual respect shown both ways. The other men who were presenters or vendors worked with us. They  were PhD's, Pastors and professionals. They all could have demanded respect because of their positions but they supported us, instead. They did not demand homage to be paid to them. They wanted us to be successful and helped us get there. This is how it is suppose to work; together making possible everyone's success.

Today, I worked with some different sisters at church. This was a mixed ethnic group and once again the "sistahs" worked like a machine. A well-oiled machine. To those who want to continue to portray us as angry, sex-crazed, classless, ugly, bossy, people, let me set you straight.

• We are loving, protective, assertive, strong, sexy but not sex-crazed, beautiful, classy, women.
• When we commit, you can count on us. 
• We are the people who have your back.

So when we seem bossy and angry, step back and ask why. It is probably because we are trying to protect YOU; help YOU. We are working for the best for YOU.

We love YOU.

Stress Reduction Check In

I began a stress reduction plan last month. I thought it might be good for accountability's sake to give an update on my progress.

I am eliminating others peoples drama from my life. Being a pastor's wife puts me in a position to face or be exposed to "other people's drama." I cab't eliminate nor do I want to eliminate the people, but I can eliminate my acceptance of the associated stress. What I am trying to say is, I can listen, empathize, problem-solve and love you without allowing your issue to stress me out. I had a recent situation that actually hurt me and made me angry. After stepping back and looking at things objectively, I realized it was not my issue. I didn't have to hurt and I didn't have to be angry, so I stopped both. Stress reduced!

I have had a few days that I did something I enjoyed that was not about church or the Outreach Center. I need more of those but I have started. Stress reducing!

I have begun exercising. I am still not as consistent as I need to be or would like. Still working on that. Stress Reducing!

Some of you commented or sent me messages stating you were going to create and begin your own stress reduction plan. How are you doing?

Let's keep it up so we can be healthier, mentally and physically.

Why I Can Fly

I Believe I Can Fly was a song made popular a few years ago by R. Kelly. Then someone Christianized it. We took to both arrangements like moths to a flame. Why? The song carried in it a hope that we could rise above our circumstances and live better lives. It empowered us. It lifted us up.

In Isaiah 40:31 the Word says Israel, an us by faith appropriation, can mount up or rise on wings like eagle’s wings. We have a hope in that it empowers us. We believe that we can rise above our circumstances, if only for a minute. We are lifted up.

But why? How?

About Eagles

Eagles are powerful and majestic birds. Dr. Miles Munroe lists 7 characteristics of eagles for his leadership workshops. We are leaders, right?

·        No other bird can fly as high.

o   Up to 10,000 ft

o   Wingspan of 6-7 ft tip to tip

·        Eagles have sharp vision.

o   They can see for miles.

o   They are very observant of their surroundings.

·        Eagles have strong loyalty and nurturing qualities.

o   They mate for life; they work together with that mate to take care of their eaglets.

·        Eagles are fearless.

o   They are territorial.

o   They will fight to protect their own.

·        They are tenacious.

o   Eagles fly into the storm.

o   It uses the winds of the storm to fly to higher heights rather than run and hide.

·         Recognizes the need for restoration. 

o   Every 40 years they pluck out their feathers, break their beaks and destroy their talons.

o   They lay in the sun at the highest place available and rest while the feathers, talons, and beak grow back and are restored.

If we are to mount up or rise on wings like eagles, why can’t we appropriate the other characteristics of the eagle? That is exactly what we have said here at Eagles Wings.

The referenced scripture text is

Isaiah 40:31 (ESV)
³¹  but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint. 

Waiting

Why does waiting on the LORD cause us to rise up on wings like eagles?

First of all, waiting does not mean sitting around doing nothing. It means to be bound up in or twisted up in. So first we are to be bound to the LORD or twisted up in Him. The tense of the Hebrew word for wait is imperfect. That means it began and will not be completed until sometime in the future. So we are to get bound up in the LORD and keep on being bound up until the end, whenever that is. I’d say we are to be bound until the end of time.

I now have the promise that if I am bound up in or twisted up in the LORD my strength will be renewed and I won’t get tired or weary.

How is that? I get tired. When you get tired or weary, He will renew your strength. He will bring your vitality back. So theoretically, you don't get tired. You don't stay tired. Mental and spiritual renew greatly aids physical renewal.

How then is He able to do this? He is God!

God ask Israel and now us in Isaiah 40:18.

Who is like me? With whom will you compare me?

The answer

Isaiah 40:22-25 (ESV)
²²  It is he who sits above the circle of the earth, and its inhabitants are like grasshoppers; who stretches out the heavens like a curtain, and spreads them like a tent to dwell in;
²³  who brings princes to nothing, and makes the rulers of the earth as emptiness.
²⁴  Scarcely are they planted, scarcely sown, scarcely has their stem taken root in the earth, when he blows on them, and they wither, and the tempest carries them off like stubble.
²⁵  To whom then will you compare me, that I should be like him? says the Holy One.

In the book of Job, God has a conversation with Job about this same thing. During Job's loss, his friends came to console him and help him understtand what had happen to him and why. However, in spite of their good intentions, they were way off the mark for what Job needed. Job didn't even know what he needed. He had one perspective and God had another. So the question God asked was 

Job 38:2-4 (ESV)
²  “Who is this that darkens counsel by words without knowledge?
³  Dress for action like a man; I will question you, and you make it known to me. ⁴  “Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth? Tell me, if you have understanding.

The remainder of that chapter describes God's supreme creative powers, His supreme sovereignty, His supreme self-existent self. 

And that has what to do with me?

This is He to whom I have bound myself. 
If He has done and is all that

• Surely He can renew my strength. 
• Surely He can cause me to or give me the ability to rise above my problems; above my fears; above other people’s drama; financial shortages; sickness and anything else we have to face.

The question then is to whom are you bound? 
One who can cause you to fly or one who keeps you scavenging on the ground?

If you have chosen to be an eagle rather than a pigeon, chicken or turkey, then remember the characteristics that you possess or have available to you. You have the God of gods, empowering you. And while you are being restored you are being carried on His wings.

That's why I can fly. Are you ready to fly? MOUNT UP!

This is a portion of the sermon I delivered on September 28th at Eagles Wings Christian Church

Feeling Uninspired To Write

It's Monday morning in sunny, hot Southern California. I had a beautiful but busy weekend. I know in the world of blog I need to post if I want you guys to stay connected. But today, at this very moment, I feel so uninspired to write. I only feel like sleeping.

Beginning the day a little tired just makes all that is vying for my attention more overwhelming,

        I wanted to clean up my outlook file.
                It seems to have grown more than usual over the weekend.
        I wanted to shred paper. I think the paper had babies when I wasn't looking.
        I wanted to do some housework. Not all that is needed but just some of it.
               My plan is to do a little each day until I'm satisfied.
               You don't understand, my level of satisfaction may never come.
               My grandmother set "white glove" standards and I have been infected.
        I want to sew. That's my fun time.
        I have to work. See why I am uninspired.

It's Monday and that is just way too many decisions to make. I think I will run some errands. Get away from all these wants and needs. Who knows maybe inspiration will be found in the sunlight. After all it is a beautiful Southern California Day.

Under the Dome Continued

I left you yesterday at the point of how I understand our rebirth will happen.

Growing Up
Our spirit has been reborn but there is a growing up period. The growing up of our Spirit happens in the grace period. It begins with the washing by God's Word (teachings).

Ephesians 5:25-27 (KJV) 
²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
²⁶ That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
²⁷ That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.

Just a note. When the word church is used here, it is not talking about that building or any one grouping of people. It is talking about the ones who are followers of the teachings of the Christ.

Titus 3:4-7 (ESV) 

⁴ But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared,
⁵ he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but

according to his own mercy,

by the washing of regeneration

and renewal of the Holy Spirit,

⁶ whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior,

⁷ so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

The keywords in these verses are saved, washing, regeneration. Saved in the this usage means to protect or deliver; washing means bath; regernation means rebirth, restoration, renovation.
So He is delivering and protecting us because of His compassion towards us. Not by things we do but by giving us a spiritual rebirth bath and the Holy Spirit’s renewal which means renovation.

The Purpose

In the course of this washing, God sets you aside to do something that will help others.

We call that ministry. Kind of sounds like everyone under His dome has a job to do. There are no slackers in this group. The other difference between God’s dome and Chester’s Mill is that those who live under God's dome can go out to tell others about life under God’s dome and invite them to come and live there. It also gives them opportunity to serve them; meet their needs; help them. When their job is done for that period of time, they can return to the dome but no one can follow until they have made a sincere decision to move in. God knows. He gives the ability to pass through or not.

The Original Question

So, what do we mean when we ask someone if they have accepted Jesus Christ as their personal Lord and Savior?

What we are asking them, whether we realize it or not is

Have you made the decision to be spiritually bathed by the water of His Word and your nature to be renovated or made over by the Holy Spirit?

Have you accepted that He has poured out His compassion and graciousness on you so that you can be declared innocent and live eternally with Him?

Are you learning how to live under His dome according to His rules and are you willing to obey?In other words, are you in a student of the word so you can know the Word; so you can be renovated by His Spirit; so you can be presented before the Godhead without defilement or wrinkles and live with Him eternally?

And you are saying

Since I am telling you that you need to do this, I am indirectly declaring that I have done this. 

• That I am living under God’s dome, according to God’s rules and

• I am studying to know what they are.

• I am obeying His word and agreeing to the Spirit’s renovation of my spirit.

• And I am doing the assignment He gave me.

So when we pray, sing, or testify that we belong to Him, that He is the Lord of our life, our life needs to look like it. People need to see it before we tell them. They should experience His love through our treatment of them, even if we don’t particularly like them. He changes that if we are obedient.

Then and only then will the unsaved, unprotected, undelivered will know what those words mean. This is not a play thing. It’s real.

We need to stop playing with God. We need to stop with unprofitable traditional behavior that serves absolutely no purpose. We need to erase the lines of division that denominations have formed. We need to focus on who He is, who we are in Him and what He expects from us. He came to heal the sick. Not just those with physical illness, but mental, emotional and spiritual.

Religion has made a lot of people sick.  All the rules that have nothing to do with what He said have hurt people when they thought following them was what they needed to do to be right with God.

Maybe, just maybe we who live under God’s dome need to look at ourselves and determine if we have become complacent. Do I need a bath of spiritual refreshing? Do I need some more Holy Spirit renovation? For me it was a loud, resounding Yes. I had to cry out and I am still crying out.

Where are you living. Under or Outside God's Dome?